Life is such a paradox.
There’s beauty in the strong.
There’s beauty in the falling apart.
I learned that from you.
We live in between these spaces.
Trying to make sense of it all.
Trying to find light in the darkness.
You were such a bright light to so many.
But you were the brightest light to me.
You taught me what unconditional love is,
You were safety, a haven,
Both your arms and your home.
A safe place to be myself, to be a child, to be free.
I still feel your presence around me.
No matter how long you’ve been gone.
I remember so many things about you, but most importantly,
I remember what it felt like to be loved just as I am...
No filter, no pretenses, no boxes, no trying to be good enough.
Today I’m crying because I get to say goodbye to your special person,
Your chosen tie to the world of the living.
His passing feels a bit like loosing you all over again.
I say I’ve lost you but then I can feel your presence,
Right here next to me on this plane.
Yet another paradox,
Are you here? Or are you gone?
I can still hear the excitement in your voice,
And feel you squeeze my hand.,
I can hear you saying how you are waiting for him on the other side.
I can feel your love from worlds away,
And from right here by my side.
Makes me wonder,
Are you really gone?
This life is the weirdest mystery…
So we continue to live between these spaces,
In between these hues of gray.
Trying to make sense of the paradox.
XO Freya